let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize