brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
My sheets look like a crime scene.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
