i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
