Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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