Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
