I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
