spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
