i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
