dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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