I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
