I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Randomize
