So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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