Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry ottawasilver hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(973): View more from New Jersey

I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?

Fav 12 2987 857
share tweet
(508): View more from Massachusetts

Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again

Fav 39 3181 894
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(801): View more from Utah

so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me

Fav 81 9000 1362
share tweet
(416): View more from Toronto

He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.

Fav 31 8385 1611
share tweet
(443): View more from Maryland

She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.

Fav 21 8765 1302
share tweet
(860): View more from Connecticut

My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..

Fav 15 5700 1824
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(865): View more from Tennessee

Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?

Fav 10 1371 2485
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(773): View more from Illinois

I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915

Fav 3 337 591
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(404): View more from Georgia

We still on for Manwhore Monday?

Fav 0 138 26
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT