I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
