YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
