we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
