I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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