it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
