I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
babies were throwing up all over the place
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Found the puke drawer
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
