come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
