Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
