Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
