i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
They took my balls.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
