I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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