i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
