is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
