How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
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