i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
