My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Randomize
