Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs

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(512): View more from Texas

we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?

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(+61): View more from Australia

He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...

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(818): View more from California

I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.

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(517): View more from Michigan

Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?

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(302): View more from Delaware

Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?

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(416): View more from Toronto

i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"

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