That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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