My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
operation have a gay friend backfired
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I have tasted many bathrooms
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
