Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I just forgot I was standing up.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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