Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
