Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
