Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
