Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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