I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
