Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Watching her eat just hurts me
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
