I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
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