just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
It's shark week go big or go home
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize