so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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