thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
