How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
