i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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