You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
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