Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
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