My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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