Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
