yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Randomize
